Well I haven't updated this in awhile - did pretty good for a semi-fake blog though.

This doesn't mean, however, that I haven't injured myself. 

I currently have a bruise on my elbow from smacking it into a wall earlier today and another on my shoulder. The one on the shoulder was from a more extravagant fall into the wall last week. 

Brandon immediately burst into laughter and pulled up this video, feeling that it was fitting to what he had just witnessed me do. 

Think before you touch

Straightening iron fell to the floor today and I went to grab it. From the top. While it was on high. I have 2 nice and straight burns across 2 of my fingers now.
I also seem to have contracted Lymes disease while in France after about a day in the woods. Any one have worse luck than that?

I might need LifeAlert...

I now have more in common with my elderly neighbors. I've fallen and I couldn't get up.
How to fall like a special whoops bunny (my nickname given by the lovely Joey):
1. Walk into the shower, nearly slip - but catch yourself.
2. Go about your shower, creating a nice yet unnoticeable lining of slippery soap on the floor.
3.  Go to shave your legs - or do anything requiring...well standing, preferably on one foot.
4.  Suddenly-and inexplicably- start to slip (backwards...then forwards... then just wobble) and land on your side on the floor.....of the shower.....when you're 21 years old.
5. Lay still for a few seconds, wondering to yourself what the hell just happened - also contemplate your possible life expectancy at this rate.
6. Exit shower
7. Google "Concussion symptoms"

Magazines- also dangerous

The universe is apparently telling me I should clean my house.
This morning I was quickly running out of time to get to work so I go to put my shoes on, slip on a magazine (they're very slippery fyi), knocked over half of a shelf of stuff and landed on my knee- painfully. I actually had to sit there for a second before being able to move. Now if it's in the perfect spot, it kind of burns. Only me.

I did just about the same thing last summer. I walked out of the bathroom (same scenario as this morning) and slipped on a blanket, sending one knee to the ground and the other legs ankle into the bottom edge of the couch - it was bruised for at least a month. Again - Only me.

Cars are dangerous...

As of yesterday, I have ran the side of my head into my car while getting into it 3 times...possibly more, I can't remember...

Evil drawers

Went to feed my cats this morning and didnt notice a drawer open when I went to pick up their bowls. Ive got a nice cut on my forehead.

Depth Perception

Half of me ran into a door frame today. Is it bad that my depth perception for those sorts of things is pretty awful?